I have a love-hate relationship with each digital app that shows me memories.
I mean, it’s not bad. It really isn’t.
In some ways, it helps me to reconnect pieces of my life, so there’s more in my line of sight than just this crisis or that.
But there’s no denying that being faced with a sudden memory can have an emotional impact at an inconvenient time.
John’s smiling face in a hospital room.
My kids when they were little.
Conversations with friends who have passed away.
Memories from a time that was less “responsible.”
Memories around old goals. Dreams unspoken.
Memories from before deployments.
From before Cancer.
From before Death.
These inconvenient memories pop up while I must be serious
and keep my game face on.
Making up for my shitty memory.
Oh yeah. That’s right. I was going to…
Is that even bad?
We’ve tried to create a world where public perception and professionalism always mean never showing what’s really happening under the surface.
Never let them see the mud–unless artfully displayed.
Always have a show closet near the door.
A YouTube corner.
But is that healthy?
Is it natural?
Is it destructive denial in the long term?
Life is full of challenges, some bigger than others.
And that’s how we grow as humans.
Life has always been in the overcoming.
In the transmutation.
It has always been about becoming bigger than our initial perspectives.
Digging through challenges and beliefs–layered deeper than we thought possible.
Reframing our viewpoints.
Dawning new understanding.
Digging into why we’re really here.
What meaningful thing can I learn in this experience that can serve others?
Surviving is surviving.
But to THRIVE, we must grow.
We must transmute.
But that requires acknowledging reality as it is.
In order to transmute it into something better.
Facebook showed me memories today, including a memory of profound words spoken by my son a year ago.
Somehow I needed to hear them again today.
And while I’m inconveniently emotional, I think I’m also grateful…
April 8, 2021
Copyright © 2021, Julia Meek Chambers, all rights reserved. No part of my post, writing, or words may be copied and shared without my express written permission and attribution.