I sit here marveling at how John has enriched my life
and helped me to believe in myself.
We love each other so much.
We’ve always been strong together.
John’s inextricably a part of everything
that I’ve ever become, in my adult life,
as I am in his.
My wins are his.
His wins are mine.
And yet–we’re two whole people who just happened
to like each other’s company–a lot.
In our 22 years together, we have deeply loved and
helped each other become more than our parts.
It’s actually difficult to explain,
but I am so much more today than when we met.
Like, I’m a whole multiple-reality universe bigger
and more detailed today than before.
At every possible level of the soul.
Like Shrek’s onion, I keep growing new layers.
Or is it levels of my soul, really.
And John’s love, friendship, and support are
threaded through every one of them.
John doesn’t complete me.
That’s not the right description.
He empowers me.
He takes joy for me.
He tells me that I help him see the strength
that he didn’t realize was there.
That he can do and be so much more because of me.
And that because of me, he wants to even that much more.
I get it.
I feel the same.
It’s an atonement.
Sometimes, even now, it’s a confusing reality
to realize how this really works.
Sometimes now, in the face of this adversity,
it’s also all so much clearer the importance of what we’ve crafted.
And its power.
Love doesn’t work like the fluffy images in the movies.
If we were to try to live love in that way,
it really couldn’t just work.
It’s not found so much as it’s crafted.
And it looks a lot like the richest,
most beautifully textured friendship you can imagine.
Without the solidity of our friendship,
this wouldn’t be what it is.
Honestly, if neither of us had the ability to be a quality friend,
I don’t think this could work.
Friendship is the well source of our love.
Because of John’s steadfast place in my heart and life,
I have so much more strength and confidence than I could have imagined.
Yes. Even in this adversity we face.
Yes. Even in the face of terminal brain cancer.
Yes. Even knowing that this fight may be impossible to win.
He believes in me. And I in him.
In every way.
June 27, 2017
Copyright © 2017, Julia Meek Chambers, all rights reserved. No part of my post, writing, or words may be copied and shared without my express written permission and attribution.